Re: CA and Prop 8

[cat_77]

My partner and I pretty much decided we will never marry. Even if it were to become legal, we simply don’t feel the need to have some random 3rd party legitimize our relationship. That said, marriage or not, there are some things I would like to have the rights to that tend to come with tying the knot.

I would like the right to be at her bedside if she is ever in the hospital.

I would like the right to decide her care should she not be able to do so herself.

I would like the right to be at the bedside of the children I have helped raise for the past decade should they ever be unfortunate enough to need extended care.

I would like the right to be able to authorize care for them without having to try to get a hold of their mother or biological father first.

I would like to be able to sign off on their health cards at school.

I would like to be able to travel without an affidavit from their father giving me permission to take them with me.

I would like the right to take care of them and continue to raise them if their mother died.

I would like the right to be considered a mother in the eyes of the law.

These are rights currently denied to me and I have to ask, why? What is so offensive about me wanting to take care of the people that I love and the people I consider my family? What is the great influence that any of this has on your daily life that would cause you to say no, I don’t deserve this? Why should my gender matter?

This is not a matter of marriage. This is a matter of rights.

Comments

[chattycatsmeow.livejournal.com]

Amen to all of the above. Speaking as a slash-writing divorcee who is about THE straightest person on the planet when it comes to my own proclivities:

I absolutely NEVER want to marry again. Ever. But I think that marriage should absolutely be a choice for every couple out there, regardless of the genders involved. Call the ceremony a civil union if you like, but give everyone that option.

[cat-77.livejournal.com]

The thing that gets me is that, for several states, in their zen to make sure they block gay rights, they are taking away the same rights from het couples who just happen to not be married. They still live together and raise their kids together, but never got a little certificate to say, "Go you! We accept you!"

We are lucky enough to have domestic partner benefits at work for insurance. A few years ago, one of the managers had to explain to a new girl that this meant that yes, her benefits did apply to the father of her child who stayed at home during the day to take care of the baby while she worked. She was so shocked she damn near cried.