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Boa vs. Python
Okay, so through the wonder that is ![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
threnodyjones, I got to see Boa vs Python. Why did I do this to myself? I have no idea.
This is less of a review and more of a running commentary.johnnym77? May a suggest a movie for your next Bad Movie Night?
My comments are in plain text,threnodyjones' comments are in bold. This is solely due to the fact I have yet to get colored text coding to work properly in anything other than Rich Text format, and I'm not doing that to myself again.
~~~~~~~~~~
13 minutes in. See camp, plot holes, and a naked chick. This is near painful. Yet to see DH and the bad hair. Can't tell if this is prepping me for Sumuru, or if that will be tame in comparison.
Sadly, I'm fairly sure BvP is better than Sumuru. Not that I have any real evidence yet. Though I think Emmett's hair is better than Season 1 Rodney's...
Wait til you meet agent Sharpe.
My brain. It hurts. The snake just went down on a slut. Why? WHY?
I'm not even going into the whole, "You have a one of a kind prized possession, let's operate and add crap to it and send it off to fight to the death!" "Yeah! Okay! Let's do it!"
*giggles*
Now you know why every story [[snip]] has Emmett ready to castrate Brendan just because he's 'government'.
The slut - the so obviously transgender slut. So. Bad. So bad.
It was obviously written by 14 year old boys.
Why do all their explosives look all bright and pretty and destructive, and yet barely leave any scorch marks?
Why is the naked red head never wearing anything?
Why is a supposedly trained blonde bimbo carrying her bag so it slips and constantly 'fixing' her 'computer' by hitting it? But hey, she's got shiny lip gloss, so she's all set!
> Why do all their explosives look all bright and pretty and destructive, and
> yet barely leave any scorch marks?
Because all the energy expenditure goes into light.
> Why is the naked red head never wearing anything?
... Because she's naked?
> Why is a supposedly trained blonde bimbo carrying her bag so it slips and
> constantly 'fixing' her 'computer' by hitting it? But hey, she's got shiny
> lip gloss, so she's all set!
Listen, do you know how much training it takes to be a trained blonde bimbo?
She didn't have time to learn about computers and things. Give her a break, jeez!
It is very, very shiny, isn't it?
And all the trained hunters being dumber than dirt. But hey, naked red head had to have an appropriately porny gasping for breath death, so it's all good.
Why didn't they grab the other gun, or the equipment? Seriously, had she slung the bag properly, she would't have lost it. Then again, several shots showed the 'computer' wasn't even on, even the few times it was supposedly working.
Um, they had snake sex like ten minutes ago, did she really already lay eggs? And have them fertilized? Considering they broke like Crystal Farms', I'd say no.
Oh good, blonde slut's hair dried perfectly sculpted within seconds but DH's is still stylishly wet.
I think I have to compile these into a review...
At this point,threnodyjones appears to have abandoned me, so you will have to guess her comments. Just assume they will contain snark.
They let him steal a tank! Surrounded by agents? You know what that should teach you? To handcuff people.
Oh good, a fetish scene. Every movie needs one of them.
At least they explained the eggs.
~~~~~
In summation: Stargate was good to DH. Also, he got a blonde! Can he return her?
threnodyjones, I got to see Boa vs Python. Why did I do this to myself? I have no idea.This is less of a review and more of a running commentary.
johnnym77? May a suggest a movie for your next Bad Movie Night?My comments are in plain text,
threnodyjones' comments are in bold. This is solely due to the fact I have yet to get colored text coding to work properly in anything other than Rich Text format, and I'm not doing that to myself again.~~~~~~~~~~
13 minutes in. See camp, plot holes, and a naked chick. This is near painful. Yet to see DH and the bad hair. Can't tell if this is prepping me for Sumuru, or if that will be tame in comparison.
Sadly, I'm fairly sure BvP is better than Sumuru. Not that I have any real evidence yet. Though I think Emmett's hair is better than Season 1 Rodney's...
Wait til you meet agent Sharpe.
My brain. It hurts. The snake just went down on a slut. Why? WHY?
I'm not even going into the whole, "You have a one of a kind prized possession, let's operate and add crap to it and send it off to fight to the death!" "Yeah! Okay! Let's do it!"
*giggles*
Now you know why every story [[snip]] has Emmett ready to castrate Brendan just because he's 'government'.
The slut - the so obviously transgender slut. So. Bad. So bad.
It was obviously written by 14 year old boys.
Why do all their explosives look all bright and pretty and destructive, and yet barely leave any scorch marks?
Why is the naked red head never wearing anything?
Why is a supposedly trained blonde bimbo carrying her bag so it slips and constantly 'fixing' her 'computer' by hitting it? But hey, she's got shiny lip gloss, so she's all set!
> Why do all their explosives look all bright and pretty and destructive, and
> yet barely leave any scorch marks?
Because all the energy expenditure goes into light.
> Why is the naked red head never wearing anything?
... Because she's naked?
> Why is a supposedly trained blonde bimbo carrying her bag so it slips and
> constantly 'fixing' her 'computer' by hitting it? But hey, she's got shiny
> lip gloss, so she's all set!
Listen, do you know how much training it takes to be a trained blonde bimbo?
She didn't have time to learn about computers and things. Give her a break, jeez!
It is very, very shiny, isn't it?
And all the trained hunters being dumber than dirt. But hey, naked red head had to have an appropriately porny gasping for breath death, so it's all good.
Why didn't they grab the other gun, or the equipment? Seriously, had she slung the bag properly, she would't have lost it. Then again, several shots showed the 'computer' wasn't even on, even the few times it was supposedly working.
Um, they had snake sex like ten minutes ago, did she really already lay eggs? And have them fertilized? Considering they broke like Crystal Farms', I'd say no.
Oh good, blonde slut's hair dried perfectly sculpted within seconds but DH's is still stylishly wet.
I think I have to compile these into a review...
At this point,
threnodyjones appears to have abandoned me, so you will have to guess her comments. Just assume they will contain snark.They let him steal a tank! Surrounded by agents? You know what that should teach you? To handcuff people.
Oh good, a fetish scene. Every movie needs one of them.
At least they explained the eggs.
~~~~~
In summation: Stargate was good to DH. Also, he got a blonde! Can he return her?
no subject
no subject
Oh, wait. You did. :-)